nicevagina:

I wish people would stop complaining about being put in the “friend zone”, maybe you wouldn’t be put there in the first place if you didn’t expect a fucking cookie for being nice to someone.  

aeslehchelsea:

She once asked me 

the name of my
favourite poet
and I replied

God

She laughed
and played along
and asked me
which one of his
works was my
absolute favourite

I said it was
the one
where he
wrote her
into existence

growing up is realizing that every single one of your problems is caused by you being a fucking idiot